Whatever Things Are True: the Good, the Bad and the Beautiful in the World of International Adoption

Mixed Roots Foundation Adoptee Comedy Show May 21st « Alice@97.3

If you happen to live in the San Francisco Bay Area, you may want to check out an upcoming Adoptee Comedy Show/fundraiser at The Punchline for the Mixed Roots Foundation, which provides support to the adoptee community. Mixed Roots was founded by Holly Choon Hyang Bachman, who was adopted as a young child from South Korea and raised in the Midwest. Check out the link below for details about the event.

Mixed Roots Foundation Adoptee Comedy Show May 21st « Alice@97.3.

Celebrity Adoptive Parents and the PR Machine

 

You've heard the criticisms. Perhaps some of you out there have even made them: Celebrities adopt children from China and Africa as trendy accessories. They adopt because American kids aren't good enough. Or skinny screen goddesses adopt to preserve their perfect, surgically-enhanced figures. In fact, adoption is a rank expression of narcissism. And us regular folks who adopt internationally? We're guilty of it all, plus pathetically trying to be like Angelina.

Although I don't buy into the slurs, I have to confess, my favorite celebrity parents are the ones who keep their children out of the spotlight. For example, did you know that actor Ewan McGregor has an adopted daughter from Mongolia? Probably not. Then again, as famous as young Obi-Wan Kenobi may be, he can fly under the radar more easily than a mega-star parent like Madonna. You can't always tell who's being hounded by the paparazzi vs. who's courting them vs. whose kid isn't in the magazine because mom is no longer a hot tabloid commodity, but when I suspect that a celebrity is using her adopted child as a publicity ploy, it makes me uncomfortable on multiple levels. I don't like to feel judgmental about someone when I'm in no position to know the truth of their situation. I also don't want to see a child exploited, and more often than not, celebrity parenting stories just rub me the wrong way (even when they're not about adoption.)

Which brings me to actress Katherine Heigl. While I'm not a huge fan of her work, I love that she's one of those rare stars who speaks without a filter and frequently sticks her foot in her mouth. She may lean obnoxious at times, but she's always candid and never canned. She and her husband, singer-songwriter Josh Kelley, adopted their daughter Naleigh from South Korea in 2009. Heigl has been outspoken about the adoption, sharing that her wish to adopt a child was driven by the fact that her older sister, Meg, was also adopted from South Korea. Given that personal, lifelong connection to adoption, I've never had the sense that Heigl was milking her parenthood for publicity -- until I heard she and Kelley had opted to make their daughter the star of his latest music video.

I was prepared to hate the video for "Naleigh Moon" -- until I watched it. The song is a sweet homage to fatherhood, and suffused with love. In this brave new world of social media, where the Facebook timeline begins at birth, every parent, adoptive or not, is now forced to make tough choices about way they represent their children in media. I personally choose not to put my adopted children's images publicly on line; I think I would have made the same choice for biological children if I'd had them. Others feel differently. Some parents share out of love, some for less noble reasons, and in this way, the stars really are like us  -- although only a Hollywood mom wears heels and a Mad Men-style sheath to take her kid to the park. Check out the video below.

 

 

 

Actress Sandra Oh and T.H.I.N.K. Urge Support for North Korean Refugee Adoption Act of 2011

The organization Topple Hunger in North Korea  (THINK) has found a celebrity spokeswoman in actress Sandra Oh. THINK recently launched the website thinkchildren.org to drum up support for the North Korean Refugee Adoption Act of 2011. Oh recently recorded a PSA for the group which urges viewers to go here to generate letters to Congress in support of the Act.

 

 

 

T.H.I.N.K. is a program organized by the Korean American Coalition to inform the public about famine and humanitarian issues in North Korea, and to increase civic participation in the Korean American community.

You can read the full text of the bill here. It reads in part:

 

SEC. 2. SENSE OF CONGRESS.

It is the sense of Congress that--

(1) thousands of North Korean children do not have families and are threatened with starvation and disease if they remain in North Korea or as stateless refugees in surrounding countries;

(2) thousands of United States citizens would welcome the opportunity to adopt North Korean orphans living outside North Korea as de jure or de facto stateless refugees; and

(3) the Secretary of State and the Secretary of Homeland Security should make every effort to facilitate the immediate care, family reunification, and, if necessary and appropriate, the adoption of any eligible North Korean children living outside North Korea as de jure or de facto stateless refugees.

If you're interested in this issue, you might also want to read my post from last year, about terminally ill businessman Sam Han, a Korean adoptee who has been campaigning for passage of the bill via his charity, The Han-Schneider International Children's Foundation.

 

An Insightful Look at Adoption from South Korea

 

 

Wow! Dawn Davenport has posted an in-depth look at the state of adoptions from South Korea on her blog, Creating a Family. The piece, titled "South Korean Adoptions: Canary in the International Adoption Mine," discusses the Asian country's efforts to halt its international adoption program because of the "shame" it brings the nation. She writes:

 

South Korea has struggled over the years with the label koasuch´ulguk or “orphan exporter”.  A general feeling exists inside South Korea, and many other countries as well, that international adoption is “a shameful admission to the world of the government’s inability to care for its own, the loss of a vital national asset, and … the ultimate example of exploitation by rich nations of the poor nations of the world.”  South Korea’s position has been made all the harder when starting in the 1970s, North Korea used international adoption in its public rhetoric against South Korea.  Here is a taste of what was reported in the North Korean newspaper, the Pyongyang Times:  'The traitors of South Korea, old hands at treacheries, are selling thousands, tens of thousands of children going ragged and hungry to foreign marauders under the name of ‘adopted children...''

 

Increasing domestic adoptions has been at the heart of every plan to reduce foreign adoptions, but the Korean culture, with its Confucian emphasis on familial blood lines, has historically been resistant.  The Korean government has been attempting to change this attitude in the last 30 years.  In 2007 they stepped up their efforts by providing financial incentives to adoptive parents; lessening Korean adoptive parent qualifications; easing restrictions on parental age, marital status, and family size; requiring children to wait 5 months for a domestic adoption before being placed for international adoption; advertising; and publicizing celebrity adoptions.  Despite optimistic governmental pronouncements, the hard reality is that domestic adoptions have been a hard sell.  Since the domestic adoption incentives were instituted in 2007, domestic adoption rates have remained roughly the same.

Davenport goes on to discuss institutionalization rates for Korean children, the challenges of domestic adoption, and much more. It's worth your time to go read the whole thing.

 

 

Destitute Young Man from the Streets Wows Judges on Korea's Got Talent

Have you seen this amazing clip from "Korea's Got Talent" yet? Get out your hankie.

Song-Bong Choi brought the Korean judges of the talent show francise to tears with his story of abandonment at age 3, orphanage abuse, and later, life alone on the streets, where he survived by selling gum and sleeping in bathrooms.

Against all odds, Song-bong Choi somehow managed to enroll himself in high school and cultivate a love of music. He's truly an exceptional young man with a beautiful soul. He would've been a great to blessing to any adoptive family in his homeland or abroad. Here's to a bright future for him, with the love and support of friends, and perhaps a new family of his own making.

 

 

International #Adoptions Hit 15-Year Low in 2010

David Crary of the Associated Press has a report on the international adoption numbers for last year:

The number of foreign children adopted by Americans fell by 13 percent last year, reaching the lowest level since 1995 due in large part to a virtual halt to adoptions from Guatemala because of corruption problems.

China remained America's No. 1 source of adopted children, accounting for 3,401, according to figures released by the State Department on Monday for the 2010 fiscal year. Ethiopia was second, at 2,513, followed by Russia at 1,082 and South Korea at 863...

Organizations representing U.S. adoption agencies have called on the U.S. government to be more active in trying to reverse the decline in international adoptions. However, the State Department says any such efforts must be accompanied by initiatives to provide better options for orphans in their home countries, including support for birth parents and foster care.

"Not every child is going to be eligible for international adoption," said Susan Jacobs, the State Department's special adviser on children's issues. "The first thing we need to do is protect children in their own countries."

The State Department also reported that 43 American children were adopted by residents of foreign countries last year - 19 of them went to Canada and 18 to the Netherlands.

Adult Adoptee from Korea Asks Oprah to Give Orphans a Voice on Her New Network

Korean adult adoptee Mee Sun has created a You Tube video that she hopes will persuade Oprah Winfrey to create a program on the new Oprah Winfrey Network exploring the plight of orphans around the world. Mee Sun, who came to the US at the age of 8, has also launched a website as part of her campaign. She says:

My HOPE is that if/when Oprah should see this, that she will create a show DEDICATED to helping to educate the masses about all the various issues and complexities surrounding Orphans: Adopted, Foster and Homeless kids around the world. My DREAM would be that she would hire me to work on this project with her and her team. I realize I probably have a better chance of winning the lotto, but I am FINALLY following my heart and putting faith in God, that if this is my Purpose – maybe my Dream will come true!

Meantime, I hope those who see the video (especially others who are orphans, adopted, foster and homeless kids like me), will find a glimmer of HOPE for their lives, and that you will take ACTION and perform even one act of kindness and compassion to a child less fortunate – You will be AMAZED at how your heart is FILLED when you do!

Here is her video:

 

Korean Doctor Defends International Adoption Program

The Korea Herald recently published an interview with  77-year-old pediatrican Dr. Cho Byung-kuk, who has worked with more than 60,000 adoptees in Korea over the last four decades. Though she's now a grandmother with her own share of health problems, Dr. Cho continues to work for Holt Children's Services until a replacement can be found, but few physicians have an interest in the demanding, low paying work. Hwang Jurie writes that:

She admitted that from time to time she feels like running away. “I couldn’t stand the children dying, one time I wrote 13 death certificates in one day. To be honest, I’m really exhausted, but there is no one to substitute this job here.”

It has been 13 years since she first tried to retire, but she has had trouble finding a successor... 

She stopped work again at the facility due to her own severe health problems in October 2008, only to come back again last year. “No one wanted to fill the job, so I came back, you won’t understand unless you see the children here for yourselves, they are helpless.”

Dr. Cho also bristles when international adoption is characterized as commerce:

"During the 70s and the 80s there were not many choices for the adoption homes in Korea. At that time, there were a large number of children given up for adoption ― 4,000-5,000 children ― and facilities were insufficient to accommodate these kids, especially those with handicaps. There just wasn’t enough room, food, or hands to take care of them."

“What would you be doing with all the kids dying from malnutrition and a shortage of medical care?”

She told a story about a couple who adopted a girl with a disease called dysostosis, a condition which causes easy bone fractures.

“I asked them why they would take these kids who had an illness, and the father answered, ‘I have an adopted son with the same disease at home, and he now is 10, I thought now my son could help my daughter move with less pain,’” she said.

“How could I have not been happy with a child that was about to lead a new life with such loving parents? If not for the couple, she’d be here like most of the children here, who stay here all their lives. One of them even celebrated their 50th birthday a little while ago. No one has the right to block these children from living their second life.”

 

Terminally ill Korean Adoptee Working to Help Other Orphans Find Homes

Amy Saxon of the Associated Press has written a story about California businessman Sam Han, a 65-year-old terminally ill cancer patient who is dedicating the rest of his life  to helping orphans.

Han was separated from his parents during the Korean war, was taken in by a farming family for a time, and then survived on the streets of Seoul. A chance encounter with an American working in Korea after the war led to his eventual adoption:

[Han] ... dreamed of becoming a doctor to help the sick he saw lying in the fields he crossed when his family fled.

A church official helped him find a place to stay in a piping hot room above a bread oven and a job cleaning the bakery below.

That left the 12-year-old little time to sleep - let alone study.

He needed a way out.

Han went to a local hospital, hoping to learn about medicine. A receptionist tried to shoo him away, but two American officials who overheard his dogged conversation with the receptionist asked to speak with him.

One of them was Arthur Schneider, a forestry expert and University of Minnesota professor in Korea to help rebuild Seoul National University after the war. After listening to the boy for two hours, Schneider offered to pay for his education.

Over the next four years, the two became close. When Schneider's contract was running out, he petitioned to adopt Han and bring him to the United States.

Schneider had to prove Han's parents, missing for a decade, were no longer alive. They learned Han's father had died. They tracked down his mother, who had remarried, and she agreed to let her son go to America.

Schneider then had to persuade U.S. lawmakers to let him bring the 16-year-old across the Pacific. U.S. law did not let single parents bring adopted children from overseas, and Schneider lobbied hard for an exception.

Copies of letters sent to lawmakers by Schneider's friends and family touted his character, Han's potential as a future American and the positive effects the pair's travel could have on diplomatic relations with Korea.

In 1961, Congress passed the bill on Han's behalf.

Han remembers scores of reporters waited for them to arrive at the airport in New York.

"I have been very fortunate. I have been much loved by so many people," Han said, recalling his first trip to America.

Han grew up to be a highly successful businessman, but when he was diagnosed with cancer eight years ago, he sold off most of his assets to clear debts from a struggling venture. He then moved in with his daughter and sunk his last $50,000 into founding the  Han-Schneider International Children's Foundation, an all-volunteer organization that sends meals to two state-run North Korean orphanages and help support orphanages in Cambodia and Tanzania.

He is also lobbying for a bill to encourage Congress to let Americans adopt North Korean orphans. Opponents say the proposal could prevent families from reuniting and prompt trafficking of North Korean children.

Han, however, believes the bill will help children, like the destitute boy he once was, make a new life.

Read more: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2010/12/28/MNLS1H0K0L.DTL&ao=2#ixzz19WV6xqDi